November 9, 2011
FW: Celebrity Lullaby
Elmo and the Letter N Lullaby—really funny!
Posts tagged ‘really funny’
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November 8, 2011
FW: Rambo Score Card
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July 19, 2011
FW: Confucius Says
Confucius Says:
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Man who run in Front of car get tyred.
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Man who run behind Car get exhausted.
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Man with one Chopstick go hungry.
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Man who scratch butt Should not bite fingernails.
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Man who eat many Prunes get good run for money.
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War not Determine who is right, war determine who is Left.
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Wife who put Husband in doghouse soon find him in Cathouse.
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Man who drive like Hell, bound to get there..
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Man who live in Glass house should change clothes in Basement.
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Man who fish in Other man’s well often catch crabs.
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Crowded elevator Smell different to midget.
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Person who deletes this has no humour!!!
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Now send it to 1 Or more people..Nothing will happen!!!
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July 14, 2011
FW: A New “Muggle” Ending for Harry Potter
How the Harry Potter series would have ended if they relied less on magic and more the “muggle” methods of war.
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July 12, 2011
FW: The Funny-o-Meter
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July 11, 2011
FW: A Harry Potter & The Book of Mormon Play Parody
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July 9, 2011
FW: Amazing Simple Home Remedies
THESE REALLY WORK!! I checked this out on Snopes and it’s for real!
AMAZING, SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES:
1. AVOID CUTTING YOURSELF WHEN SLICING VEGETABLES – BY GETTING SOMEONE ELSE TO HOLD THE VEGETABLES WHILE YOU CHOP.
2. AVOID ARGUMENTS WITH THE FEMALES ABOUT LIFTING THE TOILET SEAT BY USING THE SINK.
3. FOR HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE SUFFERERS ~ SIMPLY CUT YOURSELF AND BLEED FOR A FEW MINUTES, THUS REDUCING THE PRESSURE ON YOUR VEINS. REMEMBER TO USE A TIMER.
4. A MOUSE TRAP PLACED ON TOP OF YOUR ALARM CLOCK WILL PREVENT YOU FROM ROLLING OVER AND GOING BACK TO SLEEP AFTER YOU HIT THE SNOOZE BUTTON.
5. IF YOU HAVE A BAD COUGH, TAKE A LARGE DOSE OF LAXATIVES. THEN YOU’LL BE AFRAID TO COUGH.
6. YOU NEED ONLY TWO TOOLS IN LIFE – WD-40 AND DUCT TAPE. IF IT DOESN’T MOVE AND SHOULD, USE THE WD-40. IF IT SHOULDN’T MOVE AND DOES, USE THE DUCT TAPE.
7. IF YOU CAN’T FIX IT WITH A HAMMER, YOU’VE GOT AN ELECTRICAL PROBLEM.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY: SOME PEOPLE ARE LIKE SLINKIES – NOT REALLY GOOD FOR ANYTHING BUT THEY BRING A SMILE TO YOUR FACE WHEN THEY’RE PUSHED DOWN THE STAIRS.
SOME ADDITIONAL ADVICE: NEVER, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES, TAKE A LAXATIVE AND SLEEPING PILLS ON THE SAME NIGHT
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June 19, 2011
FW: Dads Are Awesome And Funny! Happy Father’s Day!
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June 15, 2011
FW: About Your Dead Parrot Señor Wilson
THE PHONE RINGS:
“Hello Señor Wilson, I am the caretaker at your country house in Mexico.”
“Ah yes, Ernesto. What can I do for you? Is there a problem?”
“Um, I am just calling to advise you that your parrot, he is dead.”
“My parrot? Dead? The one that won the International competition?”
“Si, Señor, that’s the one.”
“Damn! That’s a pity! I spent a small fortune on that bird. What did he die from?”
“From eating the rotten meat, Señor Wilson.”
“Rotten meat? Who the hell fed him rotten meat?”
“Nobody, Señor. He ate the meat of the dead horse.”
“Dead horse? What dead horse?”
“The thoroughbred, Señor Wilson.”
“My prize thoroughbred is dead?”
“Yes, Señor Wilson, he died from all that work pulling the water cart.”
“Are you insane? What water cart?”
“The one we used to put out the fire, Señor.”
“Good Heavens! What fire are you talking about, man?”
“The one at your house, Señor! A candle fell and the curtains caught on fire.”
“What the hell? Are you saying that my mansion is destroyed because of a candle?!”
“Yes, Señor Wilson.”
“There’s electricity at the house, what was the candle for?”
“For the funeral, Señor Wilson.”
“WHAT BLOODY FUNERAL??!!”
“Your wife’s, Señor Wilson. She showed up very late one night and I thought she was a thief, so I hit her with your new Ping G 15 204g titanium head golf club with the TFC 149D graphite shaft.”
SILENCE……….. LONG SILENCE………VERY LONG SILENCE.
“Ernesto, if you broke that driver, you’re in deep trouble!”
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June 13, 2011
FW: Sharpen Up
A great practical joke that probably originated from the many college drinking parties =).
