Archive for the ‘Animals’ Category.

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October 1, 2011

FW: Can You Find. . .

In the first picture can you find a cat?
In the second picture can you find a face?
In the third picture can you find a man?
In the fourth picture can you find the real pet?
In the last picture can you find Vincent Price?

I promise you that if you look hard enough you will find the above item in the picture. The real question is how long does it take you to find it =).

P.S. If you need more help click on one of the links above to see a picture by itself (and some of them are also bigger.

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September 30, 2011

FW: A Frickin’ Elephant?

From the diary of a Pre-School Teacher

My five-year old students are learning to read.
Yesterday one of them pointed at a picture in a zoo book and said,
“Look at this! It’s a frickin’ elephant!”

I took a deep breath, then asked…”What did you call it?”

“It’s a frickin’ elephant! It says so on the picture!”

And so it does… ” A f r i c a n Elephant ”

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September 21, 2011

FW: Wyoming Wisdom

Is the government really this out of touch with the working man?

The Sierra Club and U.S. Forest Service presented an alternative to Wyoming ranchers for controlling the Coyote population. Ranchers were using the tried-and-true method of shooting and trapping these predators.

The Sierra Club and U.S. Forest Service proposed a “More humane” solution: “Capture the Coyotes with non-injurious traps, castrate the males and turn them loose again.”

The ranchers remained silent for a few minutes, contemplating this new idea.

Finally one rancher in the back of the conference room stood up. Tipping his hat back, he said: “Son, I don’t think you understand our problem. Coyotes don’t screw our sheep—they eat’ ‘em!”

The meeting never really got back to order.

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September 9, 2011

FW: The Important Mouse Trap

A mouse looked through a crack in the wall to see the farmer and his wife opening a package; what food might it contain?

He was aghast to discover that it was a mouse trap!

Retreating to the farmyard, the mouse proclaimed the warning, “There is a mouse trap in the house, there is a mouse trap in the house.”

The chicken clucked and scratched, raised her head and said, “Mr. Mouse, I can tell you this is a grave concern to you, but it is of no consequence to me; I cannot be bothered by it.”

The mouse turned to the pig and told him, “There is a mouse trap in the house.”

“I am so very sorry Mr. Mouse,” sympathized the pig, “but there is nothing I can do about it but pray; be assured that you are in my prayers.”

The mouse turned to the cow, who sarcastically replied, “Oh no, Mr. Mouse, not a dangerous evil mouse trap; am I in grave danger?”

That very night a sound was heard throughout the house, like the sound of a mouse trap catching its prey. The farmer’s wife rushed to see what was caught.

In the darkness, she did not see that it was a venomous snake whose tail the trap had caught.

The snake bit the farmer’s wife.

The farmer rushed her to the hospital.

She returned home with a fever. Now everyone knows you treat a fever with fresh chicken soup, so the farmer took his hatchet to the farmyard for the soup’s main ingredient.

His wife’s sickness continued so that friends and neighbors came to sit with her around the clock. To feed them, the farmer butchered the pig.

The farmer’s wife did not get well, in fact, she died, and so many people came for her funeral the farmer had the cow slaughtered to provide meat for all of them to eat.

So the next time you hear that someone is facing a problem and think that it does not concern you, remember that when the least of us is threatened, we are all at risk.

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August 3, 2011

FW: Your Dog’s Plea

Treat me kindly, my beloved friend, for no heart in all the world is more grateful for kindness than the loving heart of me.

Do no break my spirit with a stick, for though I might lick your hand between blows, your patience and understanding will more quickly teach me the things you would have me to learn.

Speak to me often, for your voice is the world’s sweetest music, as you must know by the fierce wagging of my tail when your footstep falls upon my waiting ear.

Please take me inside when it is cold and wet, for I am a domesticated animal, no longer accustomed to bitter elements. I ask no greater glory than the privilege of sitting at your feet beside the hearth.

Keep my pan filled with fresh water, for I cannot tell you when I suffer thirst.

Feed me clean food that I may stay well, to romp and play and do your bidding, to walk by your side, and stand ready, willing and able to protect you with my life, should your life be in danger.

And, my friend, when I am very old, and I no longer enjoy good health, hearing and sight, do not make heroic efforts to keep me going. I am not having any fun. Please see that my trusting life is taken gently. I shall leave this earth knowing with the last breath I draw that my fate was always safest in your hands.

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If you put a buzzard in a six or eight foot square cage and leave it entirely open at the top, the bird, in spite of his ability to fly, will not escape. The reason is that a buzzard always begins his flight by running ten or twelve feet before hand. Without space to run, as is his habit, he will not even attempt to fly, but will remain a prisoner for life in a small jail with no top.

The ordinary bat that flies around at night, a remarkable nimble creature in the air, cannot take off from a level place. If it is placed on the floor or flat ground, all it can do is shuffle about helplessly and, no doubt, painfully, until it reaches some slight elevation from which it can throw itself into the air. Then, at once, it takes off like a flash.

A bumblebee, if dropped into an open tumbler will be there until it dies unless it is taken out. It never sees the means of escape at the top, but persists in trying to find some way out through the sides, even though none exists, until it completely destroys itself.

In many ways, there are lots of people like the buzzard, the bat and the bee. They are struggling about with all their problems and frustrations, not realizing that if they look up, they’ll find the answer.

Don’t you love it? Look up…. GOD Is The Answer…..

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May 27, 2011

FW: Dog Look Alikes

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March 31, 2011

FW: Deer Gone Dog

Dillie the deer acts just like a house-trained dog as she walks up the stairs & lounges around on her owner’s bed. Living with vet Melanie Butera, in Canal Fulton, Ohio, four-year-old Dillie is so spoiled she is served linguine in bed. She has even managed to work out where a deer that lives in a house should go to do her business.

House trained: Dillie the deer polishes off a plate of linguine in her owners' master bedroom

Taking full advantage of Melanie and her husband Steve’s generous hospitality, Dillie even gets to enjoy their swimming pool and five acres of property on which to run around on.

Living with the Buteras since she was three days old, Dillie now knows how to turn lights on and off and how to take ice from the dispenser in the fridge.

“We took a call from a local farmer at 3 am one wintry night,” said Melanie, 48. “Dillie’s mother was not taking to her and he asked if we wanted to try to nurse her back to health. We put her on an IV drip because she weighed four pounds and got her back up and running after around two weeks. We then realized that she couldn’t go back to the farm and live with the other deer and she couldn’t live with our horses because they scared her too much.”

Deer's best friend: Dillie plays around with Lady, the dog of the house

Leaving her in the capable hands of her eight-year-old poodle Lady, Melanie decided that Dillie was going to become the Butera household’s latest pet.

“She developed cataracts and this meant that she had to be cared for in a sensitive manner,” explained Melanie. “She would hang around Lady and she very quickly learned to act like a dog. This became apparent to us when we came home one day and couldn’t find her downstairs. We walked upstairs and found her standing on our bed with Lady. She had obviously learned a few tricks from the old dog.”

Family: Dr Melanie Butera and her husband Steve Heathman share their bed in their home in Canal Fulton, Ohio, with Dillie and Lady

Dillie slept for the first few years at the Buteras’ home in their bed with Lady. “I suppose it was quite a cute get together,” said Melanie. “Me, my husband, Dillie and Lady all sharing the same bed. My husband Steve always liked the way that Dillie would warm his feet up when she laid on them.”

Fully house-trained, Dillie now wears a GPS collar due to a frightening runaway incident last year. “She went missing because a gate was left open on our property when she was out roaming,” said Melanie. “So we got this collar fitted to her to keep our minds at ease.”

Enjoying a wide variety of meals, Dillie’s favorite is ice cream and coffee, topped with frozen ice shavings.

Stairway to heaven: Dillie has the run of the house, and has even learned how to use the toilet

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