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Alcohol does not make you FAT – it makes you LEAN … against tables, chairs, floors, walls and ugly people ! 

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Will Your Tongue Really Stick to a Frozen Flagpole?

December 19, 2007

The next time someone triple-dog dares you to stick your tongue to a frozen metal pole — don’t. Your tongue will be joined to the pole, and you’ll have plenty of time to ponder the thermal conductivity of metal while you await the rescue squad.

Your tongue is covered with moisture, which beings to freeze if its temperature drops below 32 degrees Fahrenheit. Your body counteracts the freezing by pumping warm blood to your tongue.

Heat from your blood warms the moisture through a process called conduction. Heat energy from the blood excites atoms in your tongue. The atoms absorb energy and vibrate. The more they vibrate, the more their temperatures increase. This incites vibrations in neighboring atoms, which take the energy and pass it up the line like a hot potato and eventually warms the surface moisture.

So why is the Fire Department on its way?

“It’s because of the high thermal conductivity of the pole,” explains Frank J. DiSalvo, director of the Cornell Center for a Sustainable Future and co-director of the Cornell Fuel Cell Institute. “The metal is a much better conductor than your tongue (up to 400 times more powerful). The metal takes heat faster than your body can replenish it.”

The atoms in solid metals are packed tightly and transfer thermal energy more readily. They also have free electrons that boost conductivity. Free electrons are free to move from atom to atom. The electrons absorb heat energy and move through the flagpole, stirring up other atoms.

As your tongue touches the flagpole, the moisture on your tongue is robbed of heat. The temperature of the moisture drops. Water freezes inside tiny pores and surface irregularities on your tongue and the pole. You’re stuck.

So now your thinking, “Maybe if I just pull hard it will come off.” Yes, it will — a piece of your tongue, that is.

Kent Sperry is a 911 dispatcher at a place where people know about cold and snow — Boulder, Colorado. He offers a less painful alternative, assuming you happen to have the necessary remedy at hand: “Pour warm water on the area where the tongue meets the pole, and the tongue should come free.”

http://www.livescience.com/mysteries/071218-tongue-flagpole.html

Santa’s chopper shot up over Rio slum
Drug traffickers target chopper, apparently mistaking it for police

Reuters
updated 6:31 a.m. MT, Tues., Dec. 18, 2007

RIO DE JANEIRO, Brazil – Not even Santa Claus is safe as the violent Brazilian city of Rio de Janeiro celebrates the Christmas season.

Drug traffickers in a Rio slum opened fire on a helicopter carrying a Santa to a children’s party, apparently mistaking it for a police helicopter, police said on Tuesday.

“They thought it was a police operation and started shooting. Luckily, nobody was hurt,” a police official said.

The helicopter had to return to its base after the attack.

Two bullet holes were found in its fuselage.

Police said the pilot, contracted to take an actor dressed as Santa to the party in the Nova Mare slum, was flying over the neighboring Vila Joao shantytown when it was fired upon on Sunday.

Santa later returned to Nova Mare by car to distribute Christmas presents.

Most of Rio’s 700-plus slums are controlled by drug traffickers and are not regularly patrolled by police, who instead go into the slums in military-style raids, often using helicopters and armored vehicles.

REUTERS

Copyright 2007 Reuters. Click for restrictions.
URL: http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/22309678/?GT1=10645

A drunken cowboy lay sprawled across three entire seats in the posh Amarillo Theater. When the usher came by and noticed this, he whispered to the cowboy, “Sorry, sir, but you’re only allowed one Seat.”

The cowboy groaned but didn’t budge. The usher became more impatient:

“Sir, if you don’t get up from there I’m going to have to call the Manager.”

Once again, the cowboy just groaned. The usher marched briskly back up the aisle, and in a moment he returned with the manager. Together the two of them tried repeatedly to move the cowboy, but with no success.

Finally they summoned the police. The Texas Ranger surveyed the situation briefly then asked, “All right buddy what’s your name?”

“Fred,” the cowboy moaned.

“Where ya from, Fred?” asked the Ranger.

With terrible pain in his voice, and without moving a muscle, Fred replied,

“…the balcony…”

Man Selling Soul On EBay For £500k
By Alex Watts Updated:13:54, Friday December 14, 2007

An American man is selling his soul on the internet for £500,000 – to raise money for Christmas.

He says the winning eBay bidder will receive his spirit in a glass jar as well as a contract “relinquishing ownership”.

He told buyers: “I’ve got no money for the Christmas holidays, and all I’ve got left to sell is my soul.

“I’m not really using it lately – and selling it on eBay is better than letting the Devil have it.”w

Full Story

I found this while my kid was looking up toys on the web. It was under the GI Joe site. You know its gonna be good when it is GI Joe! So click on the link and find out what the Kung Fu grip can DISTROY!

http://www.hasbro.com/monkeybartv/default.cfm?page=Entertainment/OnlineGames/GameSelect&game=2005